Made in the image of God, not politics
Unlikely friendships in unlikely places
Traveling is not my favorite thing to do but it is also full of endless surprises, stories and connections. On the way to Nashville, I had a connecting flight (I should have not had a connecting flight at all but I forgot to buy a ticket for an event I needed to be at 4 days later! #thanksADHD). My flight was delayed and I would have little time to get to my gate, but there was a chance.
The plane I boarded was super small, perhaps the smallest aircraft I’ve flown in and it made me anxious. I sat next to a big guy, and when he got up to let me have my seat, his phone screen saver flashed a cartoonish, sunglassed, 2 middle-fingers-up Donald Trump picture. Hmmmm I thought. But as I have prayed this week, for the Lord to keep me from harboring hate in my heart— I prayed it again silently, keep me soft toward those I don’t think like. We chatted a little bit about his job, he’s a building engineer and other talked about other regular things. I had my headphones ready to go, but he didn’t have his. This is code speak, we all know, to talk or not to talk to strangers.
“You’re a big Trump fan? I noticed your screen saver.”
“Not really,” he chuckled.
Curiosity compelled me, “How do you think he’s doing so far?”
“Pretty good,” he quipped.
“How so?”
And so we kind of talked through all the things he thought were going well. I told him I was a moderate and how chaotic it all feels. I told him about my husband’s birthright citizenship and how it sucks to have people talk about people like they’re objects, not people. He understood and agreed, “You know what, I was very into Trump at the beginning, sucked in, and we had the news on all the time. Alerts and all that. And it was causing so many problems in out house (he has 5 kids who are all grown and fall on all sides of the ticket). And so we all decided to stop watching the news, turn the alerts off, and not talk about politics in our house. It was the best thing we ever did. It changed all of us for the better. That’s when I knew I’d never go back to being so consumed by it.”
“That’s so wise,” I responded, “It’s really hard to be saturated in it on both sides and it causes so many relational problems in families, including my own. And then we forget that we’re all humans even if we don’t agree.”
We went on to talk about school vouchers too and came to some agreements, some disparities. At some point, we began the descent after an hour and 20 minutes together. The flight became quite turbulent. In one drop, I grabbed his arm and closed my eyes tight.
“You know, this is called the Windy City,” he said calmly. “Every time I land here, it’s bumpy.”
“Ok,” I said lying, with my eyes closed. I am a nervous flier, surprise! I let go of his shirt. It felt like the wind was whipping us around a bit and I grabbed his arm again (which is so embarrassing, I just met this guy.)
“We are almost there, I can see the tarmac. It’s going to be like 10 seconds. You’re going to get there.” And we landed and I apologized for all the bruises he might have on his upper arm. He knew I had a tight connecting flight and pulled up a map of the airport. “This is where you are and this is where you need to go. Turn right, then turn right again. If you run, you might have a chance.”
“Thank you for helping me,” I said looking back. I didn’t catch his name but I remember his smile.
We landed in Chicago and I sprinted to my gate, which made me a little sick. And very disappointed when I got to my gate to see my plane still there, but the door closed. WOMP. I would have to wait an hour for the next flight. A guy flying standby had just secured his ticket at the desk and saw me all sad and said compassionately with a thick Chicagoan accent, “That’s disappointing isn’t it? You'll get there. Just a little late.” And I went to eat a quick lunch. When I came back there were no other seats except compassion guy, “Where are you headed?” I said. He explained a dealership had a truck he wanted in the exact color he wanted, so he was going to pick it up. But it was a saga, as car dealerships are shady sometimes, so he wasn’t even sure if he’d have a truck to drive home. If it got too late, he’d spend the night in a hotel. But he had 0 luggage which made me laugh, “You’re essentially camping, David.” He was an airplane mechanic with 2 kids. I told him about the turbulence and he said, “Well everyone is anxious with all these airplanes falling out of the sky. These DEI hirings aren’t good for anyone.” Stay soft, I thought. As we boarded, we chatted into the airplane and split for our seats, he said, “Good luck at your speaking thing.”
I replied, “I hope you get your truck!”1
When I got to Nashville, traffic was horrendous. And I wouldn’t be able to make it to the event on time. Luckily I talked the next day, not that night. I arrived to my friend’s house pretty tired and they burst through the doors with the best hummus of my life and apperol spritzes. We had a lively political discussion, arriving at different conclusions but we also cried about the best years of our lives when we boated to and from each others houses 3 times a week with chicken and rice and puzzles. It’s really hard to hate people on the other side if they bring you hummus. Truly it’s hard to not see a person as a person if you eat together regularly and laugh till your face hurts. 10/10 recommend.
The next day, the uber driver picked me up was a Black man. We chatted about our lives. I asked him how he was feeling about the current environment. And he sighed, “This isn’t our first time doing this. We will get through this. We will put our heads down and remember that nothing lasts forever. There are always hard times, but we come out of them. I am going to keep writing and performing my music, and fighting for my kids and you are going to keep speaking and writing. I hope we get to meet again when you come back to Nashville.”
“I hope we do, Nathan. I hope you get custody of your kids.” It was a little sermonette before my talk.
Of course 15 minutes before my talk, I get a frenetic call from my husband that says there’s a shooter at the Dallas Convention Center and Penelope is seperated from her friends and hysterically crying while hiding. “You need to have your people pray!” and then he hung up as he drove to the convention center in traffic, using the side of the highway to pass cars. People were honking at him, annoyed. But that man was on a mission to find his baby. And I sat there stunned. I called Penelope, “Mom, I’m so scared,” she wept. “It is scary. But you are going to hide. And dad is almost there. I am praying. You are going to be ok. I love you.” and the connection broke. I was sick. 5 minutes before I go on, I get the text. I have her. She is safe.
Then, shaking, I go give my talk: It was about the body not being separate from the soul and how we’re all a nephesh and all made in the image of God. So we shouldn’t slander ourselves and others. You gotta watch this video from the Bible project on it!
I did a q and a, and hours that pass before we hear it wasn’t a shooter—just 2 parents fighting, knocking over polls, and ensuing a mass stampede exodus of 5ok people. People were trampled and traumatized. And of course, I had asked for prayers on instagram, so I updated there. Most people are nice, but then there was a couple “Take your woke fake news agenda somewhere else.” Stay soft. Do not let hate hide in your heart. They are nephesh.
I traveled by Uber from a woman with long braids and a thick Caribbean accent. I asked her how she liked Nashville and she said any place is better than being back in Jamaica where she escaped her previous boyfriend and stalker (who beat her regularly). She had to flee for her life. Goodness gracious, to be in that position. To be so strong, to come here with nothing and not know anyone and make a life. But she’s doing it. “M’life is hard but it is better than being dead.” Ain’t that the truth: human life is so sacred. Nephesh!
On my flight home, I traveled first class. Not on purpose but when you add the luggage fee and the options, it evened out and was almost the same price as economy. Rarely does that happen, but I was happy for the idea of Prosecco on the way home after the crazy weekend. The stewardess was struggling with the overhead bins. I stood up and pushed ours up, while she explained she had an inflamed rotator cuff that was giving her such problems on her long shift. “Then I’ll just close the rest of the bins.” In her Jamaican accent she said, “That’s so nice. My shoulder isn’t having it.” So I did her half of the main cabin too while we chatted, sort of jokingly. I sat down and she told me she wanted to give me delta rewards points. “I don’t have Delta rewards. I’m not really a big flyer. I don’t need it.” “Then let me email you a credit,” she chided, “And You have to sign up for delta rewards. It’s silly if you don't.” And the woman in front of me turned around and agreed. She brought me that Prosecco and lingered chatting with the six rows of people and eventually came to me, “What do you do?” “I am a writer and do some social media stuff,” I say. “I don’t have social media,” she confessed. “That’s probably for the best!” I laugh. “I try and help women write their stories down.” She told me some of her heroic story and like she bossed me into delta rewards, I bossed her to share her insanely brave and tender story. She’ll get there when she’s ready.
I got in at midnight, and walked down to get my luggage. It became a little more crowded as we all waited blurry eyed. I felt a tap on my shoulder. “Hablas inglés?” Well I did minor in Spanish but completely forgot it all. “No.” But he handed me his luggage tag and said, “Donde?” “Oh ok, let’s see,” I said scanning. “Right here,” I pointed. This guy didn't know how he was going to get to his destination but he was determined, and probably a little afraid. You’ll get there. There are so many brave people everywhere doing brave things with complicated stories and they don’t look like us or believe just like us, but they are made in the image of God. They’re so valuable and so precious and so worthy to be seen and known and loved. Look at all these Nepheshes2! Dehumanization never got us anywhere except travesties, so we must keep fighting to see each other, especially in these divided times, as fearfully and wonderfully made.
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I still am way too invested in wanting to know if he got scammed last minute or got the truck lol.
I don’t think that’s a word.
One of my faves — you and also this post.
Beautiful, timely, needed. Remembering our shared humanity and that we're all made in God's image is the way.